life is good


the last 2 days I was somewhat thrown, I had to make a decision to distance myself from someone close to me. Its was my aunt who sparked this feeling, in the past she was like a mother figure since my mom was accidentally murdered when I was like five – she did a lot for my sister & me. I say like because I recognize a clear distinction between a birth mother and someone who may do things for you in absence of a mother, there  can actually be ulterior motives and self serving reasons . And would they then be at peace if you outdo they’re own kids in life?   So what happened you ask ? Well  She didn’t say anything in particular, just that she spoke to me in a posture that I can’t accept. No one talks to me that way , I give no cause to . It was calculated. I’m not a kid – I cant explain it – save but to say it was trying to be oppressive, accusatory and intentionally so. She was projecting a image of a little kid she was talking to and that’s cool – no heat.   What disappointed me was the fact that she spoke to me like I was unworthy of respect, it disappointed me because I know its game… Trying to pull what she thinks is a string she has instilled in me since my childhood. People who know you for a long time especially your formative years swear they have your number.

part 2

what disappoints me most is that I have lost respect for my aunt  in regards to using manipulation and ego needs. Maybe i’m over reacting but I am keen on matters  like this usually. And later on the person comes back all apologetic not so much in words but often in deeds. Thing is i’m not a puppet, you can’t act one way towards me one day then try to come back and “be nice” to me as if nothing ever happened. And truth be told that’s a common trait I see in family. I say life is good because – what can be done. People will be people, and your not willing to see they’re side and vice versa. Best to peace it up and keep its moving.  Salute  !

-ST

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~ by BE LIKE WATER on July 27, 2012.

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